Monday, September 12, 2011
Living To The Fullest: Never Have I Ever
Have you ever had one of those days where everything is going just fine, and you can't feel any happier. You're doing good in school, have three or four good friends, a nice room and roommate, doing well in classes, the usual stuff. Then the next day it's just WHAM! Everything that's bad and beyond can and does happen. Like yesterday was 9/11. It was such a terrible day to be happy, but I was. Maybe it was because I was thankful for everything that I have. And then today, everything just goes wrong. Then to top it off, I'm still angry at my boyfriend because something his friends did upset me and it was like he didn't care and didn't ask them to stop, and I just fought with him over everything. And he didn't even want to be around me, and I understand. I'm crazy and psycho. Who wants to be around that, especially when they're PMSing. And to screw it up even more I told him we're done. And now I really think we are. Never have I ever taken a shower that was so long. And now I can't fix it, since I'm a huge screw up. I just want a re-do on this day. I want my boyfriend back. I've never had my heart hurt so much. And now I have to learn to fix it. and deal with the repercussions of my actions.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Living To The Fullest: Remembrance
I've spent all day watching the History Channel Remembers 9/11. I've been fine all day, seeing all the same things from that day in the past, seeing the documentaries. This timeline show that was on when I turned my TV back on after coming back from dinner made me motivated to write again.
This is by far the most moving show I've seen on History all day. Seeing the people up close, and their reactions, seeing these grown men cry, seeing these people who are not in an authoritative position and just volunteering to clear the mess, just brought me to tears.
Seeing pieces of the planes on the ground, seeing the people sift through the debris, finding parts of bodies that had just been crushed by the devastating collapse of the Twin Towers.
This was not a documentation; there was no narrator, nothing to make the mood lighter, this was a story of what had happened. I want to see more shows and movies and videos like this.
There was a scene, as soon as I turned the TV on, that was of a child in Kindergarten or First grade. His mother was crying, so I'm not sure if that was from the sheer fact that there were attacks, or that someone she knew had died in the crash or collapse. But the little kid was asking the cameraman if he had seen the World Trade Center before, and if he could see it now. The fear in this little boys eyes as he finally understood that these buildings were not there anymore, for reasons that he was way to young to understand, is what brought me to tears. A part of it reminded me of when I was young 10 years ago. Not knowing what was going on, but still being afraid. It makes me glad that I didn't actually know what was going on. The fear that this caused was far greater than anyone could imagine.
Seeing this family come back to their house 10 blocks away from ground zero and see it covered in ash and dust and debris just was a shock. They had 61 messages. They tried to listen to the first 20 and they were all just jumbled. Then they finally had a legible one that was asking if they knew what was going on.
Seeing families that had been notified by their relatives and loved ones that they were doing something to stop another devastating event by bravely bringing down United 93. And then seeing the families of those loved ones that were still missing at Ground Zero. And then being reminded of the skyline being so bare after the buildings collapsed.
Events like these make me remember that I have everything. And they give me the motivation to just write about how I feel, and how I feel people should be viewing 9/11.
Don't remember where you were, remember WHO you were there with. Imagine if those people were just gone, nothing left, a missing person. Love what you have, because one day it may not be there.
What these people did to us, how they tried to break our country, was terrible. But from it, we gained a country of unity.
Hearts and prayers to those Firefighters, police, volunteers, heroes, everyday civilians, who witnessed, lost, and lived through the terrors of 9/11
This is by far the most moving show I've seen on History all day. Seeing the people up close, and their reactions, seeing these grown men cry, seeing these people who are not in an authoritative position and just volunteering to clear the mess, just brought me to tears.
Seeing pieces of the planes on the ground, seeing the people sift through the debris, finding parts of bodies that had just been crushed by the devastating collapse of the Twin Towers.
This was not a documentation; there was no narrator, nothing to make the mood lighter, this was a story of what had happened. I want to see more shows and movies and videos like this.
There was a scene, as soon as I turned the TV on, that was of a child in Kindergarten or First grade. His mother was crying, so I'm not sure if that was from the sheer fact that there were attacks, or that someone she knew had died in the crash or collapse. But the little kid was asking the cameraman if he had seen the World Trade Center before, and if he could see it now. The fear in this little boys eyes as he finally understood that these buildings were not there anymore, for reasons that he was way to young to understand, is what brought me to tears. A part of it reminded me of when I was young 10 years ago. Not knowing what was going on, but still being afraid. It makes me glad that I didn't actually know what was going on. The fear that this caused was far greater than anyone could imagine.
Seeing this family come back to their house 10 blocks away from ground zero and see it covered in ash and dust and debris just was a shock. They had 61 messages. They tried to listen to the first 20 and they were all just jumbled. Then they finally had a legible one that was asking if they knew what was going on.
Seeing families that had been notified by their relatives and loved ones that they were doing something to stop another devastating event by bravely bringing down United 93. And then seeing the families of those loved ones that were still missing at Ground Zero. And then being reminded of the skyline being so bare after the buildings collapsed.
Events like these make me remember that I have everything. And they give me the motivation to just write about how I feel, and how I feel people should be viewing 9/11.
Don't remember where you were, remember WHO you were there with. Imagine if those people were just gone, nothing left, a missing person. Love what you have, because one day it may not be there.
What these people did to us, how they tried to break our country, was terrible. But from it, we gained a country of unity.
Hearts and prayers to those Firefighters, police, volunteers, heroes, everyday civilians, who witnessed, lost, and lived through the terrors of 9/11
Living To The Fullest: Remembering
Today is September 11th, 2011. Today, I am 20. I was 10 years old when the Twin Towers fell. It has been 10 years since the terrible events that happened that day. I remember I was sitting in one of my 5th grade classes. We were in the middle of a lecture and another teacher from my "team" came and pulled my teacher out. When he came back in he told us we all had to go to the cafeteria and wait for buses to arrive, that we were getting an early dismissal. When our buses arrived we had to go straight to our lockers and then straight to our buses. I remember us all being so scared. We were the youngest in my middle school, and no one knew what was going on, nor would they tell us. They told us our parents would explain when we got home.
I remember when I got home my mom was surprised. I told her that we got an early release and no one would tell us why. I remember sitting with my mom watching the coverage. I remember I still didn't totally understand, who could at that age. I do remember that I saw those buildings on fire, and them talking about everything; the fires, the plane crashes, the people covered in ash, the people jumping from the buildings. I went to sit in my front yard to wait for my little brother to get home. I realized that it was sooo quiet. Where I live is right under the airline for planes. There were non in the sky and I thought it was so weird. I remember there were no cars on my busy little road either. When my brother got home we went back inside and just watched, not fully understanding, scared for so many reasons.
I remember every year after that. Having a moment of silence in school, special prayer meetings at church and around flag poles. Watching those video's over and over. I remember understanding more and more as I grew up. The true impact of the second plane crashing. Realizing that other plans were crashing else were. Seeing those people jump, and understanding why. Watching those two iconic towers crumble like nothing to the ground. I remember watching the movies, staring all those celebrities, playing those heroes from that day and crying. I remember looking up YouTube videos and seeing all the different angles, and watching that second plane go in. And seeing the people stand in the street as the ash and dust made their way towards them. I remember feeling the scared that I should have felt when it happened, happen years later.
Today, many people ask "Do you remember where you were?" Maybe that's not the question that should be asked. Maybe it should be "Do you remember how you felt?" "Do you remember how that impacted our country?" I now know. Then I didn't, but 10 years into the future I know.
I bought a magazine in the store the other day. The main article is about the children from 9/11. From the heroes and the innocent in the buildings who never got to see their children. These kids don't understand yet. They're the same age I was. They are the face of hope. They helped their mothers get through that time.
So, on this day, will you remember where you were? Or will you remember those heroes who fell this day. I know what I will be remembering. I will send my heart and prayers to those who perished, those who fought, those who lost, and those who gained. Those who continued to live. And I will remain living my life to the fullest. Knowing that I have everything, while others lost so much.
I remember when I got home my mom was surprised. I told her that we got an early release and no one would tell us why. I remember sitting with my mom watching the coverage. I remember I still didn't totally understand, who could at that age. I do remember that I saw those buildings on fire, and them talking about everything; the fires, the plane crashes, the people covered in ash, the people jumping from the buildings. I went to sit in my front yard to wait for my little brother to get home. I realized that it was sooo quiet. Where I live is right under the airline for planes. There were non in the sky and I thought it was so weird. I remember there were no cars on my busy little road either. When my brother got home we went back inside and just watched, not fully understanding, scared for so many reasons.
I remember every year after that. Having a moment of silence in school, special prayer meetings at church and around flag poles. Watching those video's over and over. I remember understanding more and more as I grew up. The true impact of the second plane crashing. Realizing that other plans were crashing else were. Seeing those people jump, and understanding why. Watching those two iconic towers crumble like nothing to the ground. I remember watching the movies, staring all those celebrities, playing those heroes from that day and crying. I remember looking up YouTube videos and seeing all the different angles, and watching that second plane go in. And seeing the people stand in the street as the ash and dust made their way towards them. I remember feeling the scared that I should have felt when it happened, happen years later.
Today, many people ask "Do you remember where you were?" Maybe that's not the question that should be asked. Maybe it should be "Do you remember how you felt?" "Do you remember how that impacted our country?" I now know. Then I didn't, but 10 years into the future I know.
I bought a magazine in the store the other day. The main article is about the children from 9/11. From the heroes and the innocent in the buildings who never got to see their children. These kids don't understand yet. They're the same age I was. They are the face of hope. They helped their mothers get through that time.
So, on this day, will you remember where you were? Or will you remember those heroes who fell this day. I know what I will be remembering. I will send my heart and prayers to those who perished, those who fought, those who lost, and those who gained. Those who continued to live. And I will remain living my life to the fullest. Knowing that I have everything, while others lost so much.
Friday, September 9, 2011
Living To The Fullest: Friday's
No. I am not going to post that stupid Black's song. It's so stupid. She can't sing. Personally, she just ruined the whole Friday concept. The one good thing about Friday is that it reminds me of T.G.I.Friday's. Which then reminds me of Applebees. (Don't ask, they just go together!!!!) And I realllly want to go there. But I am sicky :( Any other Friday I would make my lovely boyfriend find one and take me there :) Maybe I'll do that tomorrow.
So it's Friday. And I'm sick. Well, not really sick. More like the aftermath sick of sick. I'm doing laundry, waiting for it to be done so I can take a shower. Because I do end up sweating walking to and back from class in sweat pants. My goal for the night is to make myself as comfortable as possible. Mike is coming up tonight and I am going to make him watch me play Final Fantasy XIII, some Doctor Who, and then let him play his new game. I'm just going to snuggle up at the end of the day and have a good nights sleep. That's the best part of being sick. :)
So it's Friday. And I'm sick. Well, not really sick. More like the aftermath sick of sick. I'm doing laundry, waiting for it to be done so I can take a shower. Because I do end up sweating walking to and back from class in sweat pants. My goal for the night is to make myself as comfortable as possible. Mike is coming up tonight and I am going to make him watch me play Final Fantasy XIII, some Doctor Who, and then let him play his new game. I'm just going to snuggle up at the end of the day and have a good nights sleep. That's the best part of being sick. :)
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Living To The Fullest: The Glory of Showers
Today, I took a 40 minute shower. Not just to take a shower, but I sit in the shower. I think about my life. I cry a little. I laugh a little. I get angry. I vent to myself. Showers are amazing things. They can cool you down when it's 90 degrees outside at 11 AM. They can warm you up in the middle of winter. Showers, basically, are a best friend. Without a shower, I would feel I had no personal time. It's my thinking time. People take walks, or read, or put headphones in and tune out the world. I take a shower. Yesterday I took two showers. I might take two showers again today. Showers destress me. I get to think about things that have been bugging me, or things that have just happened. This morning something happened that bugged me, hence the 40 minutes shower. Today was a crying shower. There is just something so relaxing about sitting in the shower, with condition on my hair and crying. When I'm away from school, the shower is basically be my mom. Sure I can call her and cry and she can comfort me, but she can't hug me, or pat my head. Showers have the ability to make me feel comfort. So now, I feel better. I've taken a nice cool shower, cried, vented, and put very comfy clothes on, and will hopefully enjoy my day. Hopefully another shower won't be needed.
Friday, September 2, 2011
Living To The Fullest: Sleep and Foodnetwork
So it's 10:12 am. I just woke up. My only class today was cancelled. Yesterday I thought to myself that today would be good, the beginning of a four day weekend. I've only been up for about a half hour and I'm already bored. So I sat down, turned my TV on, and put the food network on. It's one of the only channels I get. I've checked facebook, all my emails, and tried listening to pandora, and it's just boring. I want to go sit outside, but naturally it's the hottest day, and there really isn't any shade on this campus. I never thought I would say this, but I wish I had my class today. I miss being able to see people and have something planned in the day, and this is the first day I haven't had any of those. So I'll be spending my day watching the Food Network, playing Final Fantasy XIII, and sleeping. Until Mike takes me out to dinner. A good day for alone time.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Living To The Fullest: Studying and Storms
So, I was studying during a storm. The subject was Sociology. And randomly, going over my notes, I decided to maybe start a blog. So I went to the site my good friend uses, and after a good half hour of figuring things out ('cause I'm just that technologically challenged) I think I've figured it out, and hopefully, this is my first blog. What is blogging really? Just a way for people to journal on the internet so other people can read? I feel that blogging is a way of expressing an opinion, telling a story, or even just venting. That's what I'm going to use my blog for. And before I go to lunch with this kid I love, I'm going to just start by describing my first week of my Sophomore year at Waynesburg University. Having a boyfriend really helped with the first day of my mom leaving. I'm major stressed out already, due to the fact that I need to get myself out of the rut I created for myself first semester. So that's why I'm studying, instead of enjoying this storm. I've spend at least and hour or two for the past four days studying for any class, whether it be going over my notes or actually reading ahead. I know what I'm doing this year. And hopefully, I make it into the Athletic Training Program this year. I'm going in with a positive attitude, and studying and storms are helping.
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